Sitting here at the Langham hotel..waiting for pops to get ready so we can have a great night of yummy japanese...Heading to nobu for dinner...from all the feedback I don't think I have high expectations so I hope I'll be pleasantly surprised. (written weeks ago and the food was actually not that great...)

Was really hoping to go to Tetsuya soon but alas, no one to go with...I'm fine with eating at a cafe by myself but to go for degustation at one of the top restaurants alone is not my cup of tea..So I've given up on the idea altogether.

I've realised that the one thing that frustrates me is my lack of ability to read people when it I want to..I'm usually correct when I draw my own conclusions but sometimes my vision is completely opagued. And those are the most confusing or rather delusional moments. I try not to think about things but hey, can't help it sometimes..or maybe my piscean traits are shining through and building castles in the air. *shrugs*...Eureka! Why think so much? Just enjoy life and live for the moment..watever happens will happen, and if they don't then it's ok as well..

I really need a holiday, been demotivated at work albeit all the recognition and support. A friend asked last night if I would take off work for 2 years and travel or just bum around..My answer? Definitely not. I think my ambition far outweighs my momentary demotivation..yet I question myself on what is actually more important. Drowning in a fish bowl or spreading my wings.

Maybe I should join you guys in the spiritual enlightenment course! =p


I usually love spending time alone at home, cleaning up a little, surfing the internet and listening to music, flipping the foxtel channels for good movies or the occassional E entertainment. But recently, I haven't been able to enjoy it. Instead, I find myself dashing in and out to have a shower or heading straight to the bed, waking up and out the door to work. My surroundings appear foreign and cold to me.
It's been lonely since you left.... But it frustrates me when you tell me that you love me cos I just don't see a point in it. When I see you it makes me miss you more but then reality glooms the bright of day and I feel numb once again. At the same time, I remember why we agreed to part and those reasons have not changed. I just want to move on with my life and be happy.
I think it's about time I stopped this irresponsible behaviour. Drinking till 2-3am on weekdays is just not me. I've been living on an adrenalin rush with little sleep and lots of alcohol. I've been neglecting work and in a complete cannot be f*cked mode. Really...it's time to snap out of this.


Today is another day...another day of boredom and inefficiency. I really felt like spending money today. Had lunch, shopped a little, bought a few things (new toys..yay!!)..lost money at pk but felt really good about spending time with good friends.
My heart broke today cos a friend's dog just passed away...Why do people get so attached to pets? It's cos they give unconditional love. Unconditional love that no person could ever give...at least I don't think they can. I felt so sad when she heard the news cos deaths are surrounding us all the time. As we get older, so do our loved ones and that only implies that the cycle of life will soon come to an end.. Albeit short, we all don' t really know how to live life to the fullest.When someone cries, I give in to everything...it's strange but I'll do anything for anyone when they cry..so don't use it against me. =p
I feel so aimless at the moment.. Work is mundane..love is non-existent. But yet I feel somewhat free. Free that I can do whatever I want, whenever I want...but the thing is, do I really know what I want? I use momentary excuses to fill those empty spaces and I know that it's just to distract me but yet I want more. Why not? Live life right?


Do people actually believe what's written in blogs? Cos when I read back on what I've blabbered on about, somethings just don't make sense...it's convoluted expression. Even I take my postings with a pinch of salt. hmmm gross... just reminded myself of that tequila shot I had last night with salt and lemon...plus the many other wet pussies...
And that chilli chicken did not go down very well with all that alcohol.

Just watched butterfly effect 2 on fox..it's not that great a movie but how cool would it be if you could go back in time to change the future..I'm not sure if given a choice I actually would, but the option of turning back time to prevent your greatest mistake in life could be rather appealing to most. For me, I'd rather experience and suffer the pain..Kinda sadistic to an extent. Without pain, comes no pleasure...

Just got back from Charm's birthday. It's 4.30am right now and I think i'm a little drunk...Had a blast at karaoke and 7 and for 1 thing, at least I know that if I ever lose my job, there will be those that will hire me as their wedding singer.... haha...Omg how am I gonna wake up at 7am to go to work...=(
I'm feeling a little pissed off at the moment...kinda like in shock...but at the same time, what I heard tonight is in fact reality... Maybe my sheltered life had more faith in mankind but how can you think you know someone but really not know them at all..their values, meaning in life, actions...all seems rather fake when you put them together.
When you know something is just not right, why not just stop it? When you hear news and it literally makes you throw up in disgust, why engage in frivolous entertainment? Chew it or spit it out is the way to go I think...at the same time, do I really care? I mean, I'm at a stage where everything is "watever" to me..I'm detached..and ready to take on whatever ride that comes along.